Missing Maine Wife Found

The day after his wife disappeared in a kayaking accident, a Bar Harbor, Maine, man answered his door to find two grim-faced Maine State Troopers.

“We’re sorry, Mr. Jones, but we have some information about your wife,” said one of the troopers. “Tell me! Did you find her?” Jones asked. The troopers looked at each other. One said, “We have some bad news, some good news, and some even better news. Which would you like to hear first?”

Fearing the worst, Mr. Jones said, “Give me the bad news first.” The trooper said, “I’m sorry to tell you, sir, but this morning, we found your wife’s body in the bay.”

“Oh my God!” exclaimed Jones. Swallowing hard, he asked, “What could possibly be the good news? The trooper continued, “When we pulled her up, she had 12 of the best-looking Maine Lobsters that you have ever seen and 60 good-sized Rockfish clinging to her. I haven’t seen lobsters like that since the 1960s, and we feel you are entitled to a share in the catch.”

Stunned, Mr. Jones demanded, “If that’s the good news, then what is the even better news?”

The trooper replied, “We’re gonna pull her up again tomorrow.”