
Texas Translations of California Euphemisms
I’ve lived in California my whole life and visited various towns in Texas, and this list is pretty accurate.
California | Texas | |
Diverse or Lifestyle Choice | Sinful and Perverted | |
Arsenal of Weapons | Gun Collection | |
Delicate Wetlands | Swamp | |
Migrant or Undocumented Worker | Illegal Alien | |
Cruelty-Free Materials | Synthetic Fiber | |
Assault and Battery | Attitude Adjustment | |
Heavily Armed | Well Protected | |
Narrow-Minded | Righteous | |
Taxes or Your Fair Share | Coerced Theft | |
Commonsense Gun Control | Gun Confiscation Plot | |
Illegal Hazardous Explosives | Fireworks or Stump Removal | |
Nonviable Tissue Mass | Unborn Baby | |
Equal Access to Opportunity | Socialism | |
Multicultural Community | High Crime Area | |
Fairness or Social Progress | Marxism | |
Upper Class or “The Rich” | Self-Employed | |
Progressive Change | Big Government Scheme | |
Homeless or Disadvantaged | Drug Addict or Welfare Leeches | |
Sniper Rifle | Scoped Deer Rifle | |
Investment For the Future | Higher Taxes | |
Health care Reform | Socialized Medicine | |
Extremist, Judgmental, or Hater | Conservative | |
Truants | Homeschoolers | |
Victim or Oppressed | Criminal or Lazy Good-For-Nothing | |
High Capacity Magazine | Standard Capacity Magazine | |
Religious Zealot | Churchgoing | |
Reintroduced Wolves | Sheep and Elk Killers | |
Fair Trade Coffee | Overpriced Yuppie Coffee | |
Exploiters or “The Rich” | Employed or Land Owner | |
The Gun Lobby | NRA Members | |
Assault Weapon | Semi-Auto (Grandpa’s M1 Carbine) | |
Fiscal Stimulus | New Taxes and Higher Taxes | |
Mandated Eco-Friendly Lighting | Chinese Mercury Laden Light Bulbs |