Stupid Questions Asked of National Park Rangers

GRAND CANYON:

• Was this man made?
• Do you light it up at night?
• Is the mule train air conditioned?
• So where are the faces of the presidents?

EVERGLADES NATIONAL PARK:

• Are the alligators real?
• Are the baby alligators for sale?
• Where are all the rides?
• What time does the 2 o’clock bus leave?

MESA VERDE NATIONAL PARK:

• Did people build this, or did Indians?
• Why did they build the ruins so close to the road?
• Do you know of any undiscovered ruins?
• What did they worship in the kivas – their own made up religion?
• Why did the Indians decide to live in Colorado?

CARLSBAD CAVERNS NATIONAL PARK:

• How much of the cave is underground?
• So what’s in the unexplored part of the cave?
• So what is this – just a hole in the ground?

YOSEMITE NATIONAL PARK:

• Where are the cages for the animals?
• What time of year do they turn on Yosemite Falls?
• What happened to the other half of Half Dome?

YELLOWSTONE NATIONAL PARK:

• Does Old Faithful erupt at night?
• How do you turn it on?
• When does the guy who turns it on get to sleep?
• We had no trouble finding the park entrance but where are the exits?

DENALI NATIONAL PARK:

• What’s so wonderful about Wonder Lake?
• How much does Mount McKinley weigh?
• What time do you feed the bears?
• How often do you mow the tundra?