Music Rants

Baby, It’s Cold Outside” – What About Rap Music?

If the song “Baby, It’s Cold Outside” is so offensive, why isn’t the #MeToo movement taking on very offensive Rap music?

If you’re offended by “Baby It’s Cold Outside” you’re going to have a tough go of it in life. And so are your kids.

First, you are completely ignoring the fact that the song is 74 years old–when women were ladies and men were gentlemen.

Her “protest” was typical of a way a lady would speak to a man instead of just downing some drinks and hopping into bed with him.
No one seems offended by those kinda lyrics when you hear them on the radio ALL YEAR LONG.

Men actually had to court women back in those days, a subtle dance that for both men and women no longer exists. Sad but true.

Secondly, “what’s in this drink?” does not imply that she was roofied, or at least it didn’t in 1944. Get a grip.

She’s obviously deflecting her indecision toward her drink, which again, came with the times. That was a saying back then that meant the drink was weak, she was not being drugged.

(Should we stop watching The Wizard of Oz because when they fall asleep in the poppy fields that means Dorothy is on heroin?)

Moreover, what are you worried is going to happen?? That people will hear this song, completely misinterpret the lyrics (as you obviously have) and then decide to go date rape someone?

If you were sexually abused, my heart goes out to you, but aren’t we surrounded my far more offensive material on a daily basis that might trigger bad memories? Where does it end? Is banning this song a solution to ANYTHING??

Or maybe you’re worried about your children and what they will think when they hear it? Gee, maybe it’s the perfect teachable moment to actually sit down and have a conversation with your child about how men and women USED to be. Most notably, NOT offended by everything fucking thing that crossed their path.

Yes, I agree, Rudolph gets bullied in the animated version of “Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer.” Aaaaaaand?? Wasn’t that the point of the whole fucking story!!??

It’s the ultimate story of redemption and turning the other cheek and doing what you gotta do in the face of adversity.

He was called a bunch of names by his peers but shook it off and guided Santa’s sleigh anyway–in the fog no less!

Is there a better or more stoic way to flip a red nosed middle finger at some jealous reindeer?

What if Rudolph was just offended and cried and sulked off and went to his room and that was the end of the story? A really shitty story, that’s what.

Last but not least, have you seen violent video games or watched modern TV or listened to modern radio?

And you’re still worried about a 74 year old Christmas song? Have you lost your fucking mind!?

If after reading this you’re still offended by Rudolph and Dean Martin, good. BE OFFENDED.

But please don’t imply that the rest of us lack morals or good judgement, especially when it comes to parenting.

If you want to raise your kids to be on the lookout and offended at every little thing that they might not understand or agree with, have at it.

Me and my kids will be watching Rudolph when it’s cold outside.

These other holiday songs are also on the chopping block. How did our generation ever survive?

  1. I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus: Subjecting minors to softcore porn
  2. The Christmas Song: Open fire? Pollution. Folks dressed up like Eskimos? Cultural appropriation
  3. Holly Jolly Christmas: Kiss her once for me? Unwanted advances
  4. White Christmas? Racist
  5. Santa Claus is Coming to Town: Sees you when you’re sleeping? Knows when you’re awake? Peeping Tom, Stalker
  6. Most Wonderful Time of the Year: Everyone telling you, be of good cheer? Forced to hide depression
  7. Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer: Bullying
  8. It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas: Forced gender-specific gifts…dolls for Janice and Jen and boots and pistols (GUNS!) for Barney and Ben
  9. Santa Baby: Gold digger, blackmail
  10. Frosty the Snowman: Sexist, not a snow woman
  11. Do You Hear What I Hear: Blatant disregard for the hearing impaired
  12. Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas: Make the yuletide GAY? Wow, just wow
  13. Jingle Bell Rock: Giddy up jingle horse, pick up your feet. Animal abuse
  14. Mistletoe and Holly: Overeating, folks stealing a kiss or two? How did this song ever see the light of day?
  15. Winter Wonderland: Parson Brown demanding they get married. Forced partnership
  16. I’ll Be Home For Christmas: Not if you are homeless. That’s just Insensitive
  17. Grandma got ran over by a reindeer: Homicide. Extremely violent and promotes alcoholism.

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